Life on a Roller Coaster

We have felt like we have been on a constant roller coaster ride this past month! A lot happened, and we feel like we have finally gotten to a place where we can breathe for a time (and boy, we needed it!).

Recovery after surgery did not go as hoped for. Instead of getting better and better, Joel started to seem more and more uncomfortable and was not sleeping at night. Finally on Tuesday, at 3 weeks in casts, after eliminating all other possible causes of discomfort, Dr. Fearon agreed to take the casts off early. We are so grateful he did because, to our chagrin, one of Joel's hands was suffering terribly. We will never forget that moment when the cast came off, and we saw our baby boy's hand in grave condition: swollen, bloody and the skin looking terrible. it was a miserable moment and not what anyone had hoped for! Joel had full skin loss on the inside edge of his pinky finger and his little pinky bone was exposed and the skin starting to get infected. We still don't know and may never know the cause, and this is Dr. Fearon's first time to see this happen in his entire career (Dr Fearon-the world expert on Apert's Syndrome who has operated on thousands of kids with Apert's Syndrome). We don't know what will happen to this precious pinky finger since it was exposed.  At this point, any sign of an infection is gone, but he could lose part of the finger or lose motility. This, of course, was very sad news to us. I have been tempted at moments to wish we had stayed back in Honduras or want to play the blame game at moments, but I am reminded that God so clearly led us to this place and that He is the one we have put our hope and trust in. He knew what was happening under the cast, and His purpose in all of this is bigger than us and our understanding. I am again reminded that doctors are but mere, finite men who can't control how a body heals and can't always keep bad things from happening. And I am faced with the great reality that there are things in life that are much worst than losing a little finger.

Also, I can't help but believe that this is all part of God's great plan to display His glory through Joel's life. It just seems too ironic that this would be the first time for Dr. Fearon to see this in his career-especially after switching countries so that Joel could be his, the expert's, patient. It has made us pray like never before for him and his staff, that they would see God at work in this situation and come to His feet. We have been seeing him and his staff on a daily basis for dressing changes. Also, I had the opportunity to share with Dr. Fearon and his staff that we are believers and let them know that our hope is in God as far as Joel's healing and future. We don't know what will happen, but we trust God that He loves Joel more than even we do. Please pray fervently that the Lord would bring anyone who doesn't know Him in Dr. Fearon's office to a place of surrender to Him.

On a very bright side, Joel went from being a miserable mess to being his normal, happy self within minutes of the cast coming off. We are so relieved and happy to have our sweet baby back! We felt like we had found him after losing him! And it was so exciting to see him ecstatic over his other hand which was free! He spent the day laughing, twirling it around in front of his face and staring down at his free feet. What irony to be grieving the possible loss of a little pinky, yet celebrating and rejoicing over the new tiny fingers and toes that Joel now has! I truly am thankful when I am reminded that he could be spending life with no fingers at all!

So, so, so many thoughts on life. Like I said, it has been a roller coaster ride. We have had miserable moments this last month as well as moments of great joy and encouragement. At this point, we don't know how this little dip in the journey will affect or change these next months. Please be praying for us that our hearts would truly be set on the things of above where Christ is seated at the right hand of the Father. Also, we beg of you to pray that the Lord would spare Joel's sweet little finger and fingernail and for complete healing. Pray for us as we transition to wound care at home-tonight was our first night to deal with this difficult finger by ourselves.

We praise God for the many people who have been praying for Joel and for the situation. We truly feel that there is an army of prayer warriors behind us, and we are so grateful. We praise God that Marvin has been able to go to all of the hospital visits with us and be here during this critical time when we most needed him. We also praise God for Hailey, who has been a tremendous support to us in so, so, so many practical, spiritual and emotional ways. God is good and gracious!